They Are

(If you click the "Poetry" tag on the bottom of the post, it brings up all the poems and songs that I've posted.")

Two weeks ago, I had the first ten lines pop into my head; yesterday, stuck in professional development, I thought about my kids - who I hadn't seen all week, since I'd been at home - and the rest of it just sprang out entire. I got to present it as the sacrificial poet last night at Black Pearl; it was cool, but it was the first reading of it I'd done. I did it for Lizzy B this morning, and I kicked it up another notch in rhythm - it made me a little mad at myself, I need to stop doing first readings at the mic, I should save things and practice them a bit. I get more of a rush from performing something that' s rehearsed, it feels tighter. Anyway, here's

They Are

They are bleeding
there’s 13 holes in his chest
one for every year of his life
and yeah, he runs with the wrong crowd
but it was uncle that had the knife
so now he still runs the court
but he slows when it burns
the missing pieces, I mean
they burn
they’re bleeding, and it’s embarrassing
the nurse quit because they terrified her
she wasn’t alone, the subs run away
crying
and it makes them laugh
but now there’s no one
to give out tampons pads napkins Midol
and the teacher has to ask the class
“does anyone have a tampon she can use?”,
as if life wasn’t embarrassing enough,
because the guys in 10th period are laughing
about what they they did to her last night
what she let them do
after he said I love you
they’re homeless
when you first find out one of your kids is homeless
it will shake you
they’re always late to class and
they’re always wearing the same cigarette-burn hole t-shirt
it’s summer school
so
when you are late just three times you are expelled
but when you walk them to the office
the secretary pulls you to the side
and says quietly
“they’re okay
“they’re homeless
“they can stay, you can take them back
and you don’t know how
okay and homeless
can describe the same child
and his tears
and you can’t cry - !
if you lose it
everybody is going to lose it
so, bite your lip.
they already feel bad.
they are seriously apologetic, they are sorry
they didn’t do their homework
yes, some are pissed
but others are legitimately sorry
and embarrassed
there are no pencils in the homeless shelter
and if you’ve never thought about it
there are degrees
there are shades of homelessness
they taught me that
it’s not just hobos and shelters
it’s the boy and his mom trading nights
on the couch
at his aunt’s house
when they can get in
it’s no wonder he’s pissed
he’s been wearing this hoodie all week
it smells like vomit and sweat
he’s mad because he’s fat, too
and he doesn’t know
if it’s better
to keep that hoodie zipped
and hide the pit stains
or take it off and drip
but nothing hides the sweat
and the shame and the shine on his face
they’re 12
they’re 13
they play at being adults
they drink barley
smoke marley
they don’t know the man, or the music
but they will light that shit up
they’ve got wine in solo cups, and
I think pills, pills are coming to town
because some of them have these pink spots
by their mouth
and they can’t stop scratching
they play at being adults
and they’re just as bad at it
as we are
she’s crying in 9th period
the test
was positive
she’s hoping they’re wrong
she’s too young to be a mom
she’s terrified, but she won’t be alone
and she’s jealous
because the girl sitting across from her
only caught herpes from him
now these 13 year old adults
couldn’t tell you what the economy is
couldn’t explain it, or define it
but someone needs to fix it
they know that
because Dad is sad
his job is gone
and he’s not happy anymore
he seems tiny and he never smiles
so Obama please, she edited her letter to you
twice
you need to fix it
but he, he doesn’t care about that
his dad got his throat slit
so I know why he’s throwing that chair
because this letter
is NOT going to bring him back
they ache
family is in jail
family is dead
family is crying, dying, and deported
they’re not making up the work
and it’s disappointing, but how can I blame them
they ache they weep they bleed
they hurt
they’re everywhere
she’s 3, and she pees funny
because her mother doesn’t like it
when she cries
so she grabbed her by the ankles
and swung her soft little skull into the wall
stop.
fucking.
crying.
she’s 11, she’s got AIDS
because Daddy drinks
and when Daddy drinks, he takes what he wants
they are so strong
I need you to understand that
they face all this
and they persevere
they are angry and frustrated
they are bleeding and crying
they hurt when they shouldn’t
it shouldn’t hurt to be a child
and they will take your breath away
they are brilliant
they are complex
they are funny
“playing soccer is like having babies. there’s always someone kicking you, and it happens in all seasons”
they’re funny, and they’ll steal your heart
“our class is like my fingernails. we’re all beautiful and I’d hate to lose any of ‘em”
“our class is like a brick wall we fit together perfectly
and we’re not complete with a single one of us missing”
“mr. B, have you ever been to juvie? or jail? I just
wanted to know if teachers make mistakes
too. I’m not going to be here tomorrow”
“hey, where’s your notebooks, guys?”
“Mr. B, would you do us a favor?”
“I have no unicorns but I do have free
pencils, what can I get you guys?”
“…Mr. B, would you quit smoking for us?”
I’ve cried in front of them
I cried then, and other times
I don’t feel like I deserve
to stand here in front of them
I tremble in awe and pride
at the things they achieve
I don’t teach them
I try to make them smile
so they can break out of their shell
and shine
and forget
that they’re not meant to make it
and light up with
everything they already knew
but don’t usually admit to themselves
forget teaching them
I want to get out of their way
I need you to do the same
so they can run this world
they go through so much
they hurt and cry
and that they still dream
that makes their hearts a triumph
for what they face
they still love, and care, and dream
that’s the triumph
it restores my faith in the future
of what it could be
of what it should be
of what it can and will be
it should restore your faith, too
they’re amazing, let them show you
they’re the future