For the Kids

I got one of the most unsettling emails I've ever recieved yesterday morning, and I suppose it's deserved. I'm working through my thoughts, of which I've of course produced pages. I had a day off, woke up at 11, retired to bed for an extra hour, and then played bball for two straight hours. I am loving Encanto. Anyway, I then spent three hours at Toyota getting my oil changed, and I had plenty of time then to sit and think, and apply some of the perspective I've gained since graduation, through Institute, and through these last few months. I'll write on that later; I just wanted to post the rhyme I wrote for my kids last week I mentioned.

They really are absurd; one girl has missed two weeks of school, apparently under the impression that she could just drop out (and presumably, her family didn't disabuse her of the notion, or didn't know that she was wrong). Today, she came back, and as I saw her in the hallways, I observed that she appeared to be in a ridiculously cheery mood, and thought perhaps two weeks off had improved her; instead, she was in a good mood because she had come back to school for one sole purpose: Fighting with another girl during recess. I guess kids had been ragging on the first girl for being a chicken--for not coming back to school to get in a fight--and she was finally back to settle some score.

Seriously - for many of these kids, school is viewed as an interruption of their sex lives, and a stage for their fights and establishments of reputation. Not for all, but for some. I mean, come on --coming back to school just to fight?

Anyway, this is the song that I read, and one of the girls in the fight - the one who usually attends - is one of the girls I made cry that day. Hope she remembers the message when she gets back, and in the future.

So it happened - you probably saw me cry
Saw me stop my mouth flop and the tears in my eyes
So I want to take a minute and tell you why
I come every day, and I see your faces
Smiling, sad, or angry, I just want you to go places
Because I care about each and everyone of you
(name), (Name), (Name), (name), and (name), you too
I want each everyone of you to fulfill your dreams
So when class is out of control and I scream
It's not as simple as it seems
I'm not truly angry or mad
Truth is, I feel robbed - of the day we could've had
And I'm disappointed. And I'm worried.
I feel like time is so short, and we must hurry
For the days are ticking by ever so fast
But before the 25th of May has slipped past
I want to give you everything I can
So come what may, you will stand
With your head held high and a wicked grin
The confidence that it's your life, you're gonna win
Because you can do anything you want, I know it
That's why I push you, I demand that you show it
I don't want you to keep your light locked up inside
I want you to crack your shell, and make sure you hold it up high
So you yourself can see just how bright you shine
Look at the glow coming from around yourself and think, "hey, that's mine"
That's why I fret, and that's why I stress
When you don't hear what I say and the class is a mess
Because I want the world to be your buffet
Like Burger King, so you can have it your way
And I want to make sure that happens
So it's about time I stopped my stupid silly rapping
And get back to regular class
Now you know - I don't just want you to pass
I want you to be the best
That's why I feel it get tight in my chest
and I cry
when you don't push
when you don't try
so please - put some happy tears in my eyes